OK. So, I’m fighting a cold, right? Well, all I need is just a simple box of tissues, and ya girl couldn’t find a SINGLE BOX (even of the rough scratchy kinds). So the empty Walmart, AND TARGET got me thinking. WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE THESE PEOPLE ACTUALLY DOING WITH THIS STUFF. I want to know why everything is selling out in stores! So, I came up with some of my own explanations.
At first, I was thinking:
People must be making tp forts! So, maybe you’ve seen all those YouTubers who have posted videos about getting kicked out of Walmart for making toilet paper forts, or maybe you haven’t. Either way, the only decent thing to do with stockpiles of this stuff is to build a fort with it, right? (and as a girl who lives in an apartment, I see this as the only feasible way one could actually store this much toilet paper, to be honest).
For MOVIE MARATHONS, and I’m talking only sad movies. Maybe they’ve even cut to watching the saddest scenes in every movie they know? I’m not really sure, I don’t even like sad movies…
Vitamin C Tablets (i.e. Airborne)
Some may be planning to take this stuff to try to boost their immune system before the coronavirus hits us all, but everyone hoarding all of these bad boys? Obviously they are planning on building pretty cool at-home science experiments. I’m talking at-home volcano style science experiments.
Another option? Bubble baths.
Why use real bubble bath when you can gather as much vitamin c tablets as humanly possible and make yourself a fizzing vitamin c bath (hey – if i soak in it long enough, maybe I’ll never get sick again!!)
Egg decorating. It may be the middle of march, and Easter may be about a month away, but if you haven’t started decorating easter eggs yet, you’re obviously behind the trend.
But then I realized something.. (this is the real reason why everything is selling out in stores)
I think everyone stockpiling these necessities are actually planning something really big. (and here’s where it gets good):
As a child, I always dreamed of connecting two cans with a string and creating a telephone. These people are doing it, so they can scheme and correspond with one another. The rest of their cans? Oh, they have use for that too. I’m talking FULL BODY ARMOR. Some even have enough cans for a spare set.
Toilet Paper and Tissues
This is the fuel. Right here. If you have a neighbor who has been bringing home suspicious amounts of tp, you might want to stock up, because it’s about to be war.
One morning, you’re friends, the next morning, you might be waking up to tons of toilet paper in your yard (and judging by the way both Target and Walmart looked, I think I’d be worried).
Soooo… here’s another thing that you might wake up to having in your yard… and judging by the way the stores were running out of eggs, this one might not look too pretty either.
water bottles & hand sanitizer
Anddd… you know how easy it is to clean up toilet paper when it’s dry right? Well, there’s a reason why these neighbors needed the armor. Because they are ready to make you suffer. Yup, that toilet paper won’t be dry when you wake up.
In all honesty, I know that those of us stocking up on everything is just in panic mode, I’m just asking for someone to please spare me maybe one box of tissues, haha. But in reality, stay calm, and carry on (because stressing about this will just make your immune system weaker).
I hope everyone has a nice, healthy week!